Kristy’s Story: “Same Birthday!”
“I hope the baby has the same birthday as me!”
As most young and naive couples like us, we had a plan. "The perfect age difference between children is 2 years", my husband said as we started to have children. But, The Lord has a plan. It may be different than what we think, but it gets us to the same place. Closer and completely dependent on Him.
It was May of 2017. Our son, Liam, had just turned two years old and we had found out that we were expecting again! I couldn't even wait to tell Shay, I ended up driving to his office with a positive pregnancy test in my purse to show him to good news. Even before any appointment, we shared the news with family, friends, and our church staff. We put the estimated due date in the "baby bump" app like everyone does in the beginning of pregnancy. My husband's birthday is February 22nd and the baby's due date was February 21st, 2018. "I hope the baby has the same birthday as me!"
We took the announcement pictures. We dreamed of names. We planned what our life would be like with this extra person in our family.
I had an initial appointment with my doctor at 5 weeks to do bloodwork and everything else that comes along with an initial pregnancy test. Because I was not a high-risk pregnancy, I didn't have to go back until 12 weeks.
{10 weeks}
Shay taught at summer camp each year in New Mexico, so we loaded up the car and started the drive. Three days into the trip, I started spotting. This was not too alarming for me except for the fact that I am RH negative. That means any time I bleed, I need a special shot to help keep the baby healthy. Instead of seeing a doctor in New Mexico, we loaded up the car and drove back to Colorado to see my doctor. They gave me the shot and told me it was common for RH negative blood types to bleed. Three days later, the bleeding started to become worse. Shay stayed home with Liam and I decided to go to the doctor by myself and I would let him know if anything was wrong. I was sent to get an emergency ultrasound and I was shaking. When the technician started the ultrasound and I saw the screen, I knew. I knew what a 10 week old baby should look like. I started to sob and the technician hugged me and said, "Let's wait to see what the doctor says." I called Shay and told him he needed to come to the doctor's office. I honestly don't remember what the doctor said. I just remember thinking, "Why God?"
Looking back, the Lord placed the right people in our lives to support us. Even down to that night after we found out. My husband and I were surrounded by people who had experienced the same loss and they gave us wisdom and a safe place to start the healing process.
“I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me up against the Rock of Ages”
I have held onto this quote ever since that day. We never call out to the Lord and say, "Lord, send me all the trials and tribulations of this world!" But, when they come our way, the trials and the hardships of this world bring us closer into God and His love and mercy for us. He has conquered death and this world's fallacies, so that In Him, we have peace.
“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”
The Lord showed me, through our miscarriage, to rely on Him. We can't do anything through our own will or efforts. He even had a crazy, amazing way of showing it.
Exactly, a year later. We became pregnant again and guess what date popped up when we entered into that baby app? February 21st, 2019. And when was she born? February 22nd, 2019. Shay and Lyla share the same birthday.
The other side of every pregnancy loss story is different for everyone. But, the same is true. God is working.
